She Won’t Stop Doing Good
July 6, 2008
On my first job when I worked in a retail store, they had overstock during Christmas. My co-worker let me purchase some items as low as fifty cents. It was perfect because I couldn’t afford to buy nice things for my cousins and relatives with the kind of money I was making.
I bought a lot, but still there was more left. Besides, I didn’t know if my teen cousins would like the things I picked out. So, I called my aunt and she came to the store right away. My co-worker wouldn’t let her enter the room and my aunt insisted on talking to her, herself. My aunt explained that she knows many families she can help if she is allowed to purchase the items. I was surprise when my co-worker agreed with a smile.
As we reached home, a four year old boy who lived across street came over. He had no socks and no jacket on in freezing weather. My aunt pulled out a new pair of socks and put a new jacket on him that she just bought from the retail store. She gave him the full package of socks and said, “Richard, I don’t want to see you without the socks and jacket on when you are playing outside.” By this time, these things were common to see in this home. Moreover, children loved hanging out in my aunt’s house. Sometimes, she had to ask them to go home and she would say, “Go home, you don’t live here.”
If all this was not enough, one day we received a call from the neighbors’ house. Richard’s mother stated that she had to take her husband to the hospital because he had a minor stroke. So she left her three children for my aunt to babysit. My aunt cooked some food and decided to leave it at their house before they returned home. When we entered their house it seemed as if it had never been cleaned. There was garbage everywhere! There was an open loaf of bread on the floor and cat litter next to it.
Communication is Vital
Communication has been called the secret of achieving and maintaining unity in marriage. The purpose of communication in marriage is not to get the other partner to agree. However, it is to bring him/her into relationship where uniqueness of each stands in complementary relation to the other partner.
Marriage requires partners to come in agreement for decisions in life. Apart from talking through all the factors which each partner regards as relevant, no genuine agreement can be reached.
A common misevaluation considers marriage as having only two possible states- complacency or crisis. Complacency is a threat to communication beyond the merely superficial, while crisis often precipitates communication of the most real and effective sort. Read more »
Are you Really Listening?
Is anyone out there really listening? Listening is an active, dynamic engagement between the listener and speaker. There is a difference between listening and simply hearing.
Listening brings about changes in people’s attitudes toward themselves and others. It also contributes to their basic values and personal philosophy. People who pay attention and take their time to listen become more emotionally mature, more open to their experiences in life, less defensive, more democratic, and less authoritarian.
Moreover, listening provides more information than any other activity. It builds deep and positive relationships, which shapes the attitude of the individual into a more optimistic nature. By listening the individual is also expressing, “therefore, what the other person says is worthy of my attention and concern.” So, the listener participates by showing concern and by being accessible when listening. Read more »
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